Later today I'm doing a workshop which includes a section on how to conduct Candid Conversations.Research tells us that having a healthy candid conversation is one of the toughest skills to learn particularly since so many of us either get defensive or are very skilled at being passive aggressive.
To get in the spirit of the session I thought I would look for some "great not to do's" on communicating tough topics. I didn't have to go much further than passiveaggressivenotes.com.
This is a note from one co-worker to another regarding a report they were working on.
Writes our anonymous submitter from canada: “i got back to my desk after lunch on a friday and found this heartfelt note on my keyboard. i was touched.”
adds our submitter: “i worked my ass off on that damn report!”
This was an email sent to an employee who made other co-workers uncomfortable because she was showing too much clevage. Just a thought -- an email is not the best way to have this kind of conversation
“my supervisor sent me this email because apparently someone in our office complained about my shirt,” writes our anonymous submitter in spokane, washington. “the shirt in question was a run-of-the-mill top with an empire waist…but as i’m currently 7 months pregnant, i could be wearing a turtleneck and still be showing ‘too much’ cleavage.” just a friendly reminder [you hussy, you]!! :)
What trips most people up is one persons' concept of being candid/forthright is another person's concept of being a jerk. This email was sent by someone who was applying for a job as a salesperson.